51 years old
As another year swiftly comes to an end, I find myself on the brink of turning 51. Reflecting on my journey, I feel immensely blessed to have reached this point. In my teenage years, the specter of violence loomed large due to the crack epidemic, leaving me anxious about a potentially tragic end. Amidst the drugs and crime, thoughts of mortality were a frequent companion, a topic seldom shared with others.
Upon reaching 21, I found myself in college, surprised and without a concrete plan for the future. Living day by day, immersed in a cycle of indulgence, I failed to realize my potential and inadvertently hurt those around me. Graduating at 24, I was an adult with little self-understanding and no clear path forward, questioning the worth of my existence.
Fatherhood thrust itself upon me in 1998, although I had unknowingly been a father since 1996. As a young father, I stumbled through, making numerous mistakes and offering excuses for my shortcomings. Despite building a career and enjoying social success, my relationship with my children suffered, and I reached 2010 with a familial disconnect.
A pivotal decision marked a turning point in my life. I chose to relinquish blame, acknowledging that the past couldn’t be changed, but a promising future lay ahead. From 2010 onwards, I adopted a new approach, striving for daily improvement and acknowledging my flaws. Despite progress, I recognize the work that still lies ahead, my primary fear being the possibility of not reaching my full potential due to over a decade wasted in fear.
Over the last 14 years, I’ve undergone a transformation. My story, which began on the wrong side of the tracks, took a positive turn when I decided to create a better narrative. The journey involved tears, shouts, mistakes, and numerous falls – a challenging process. Today, I no longer waste time, for every moment is crucial in pursuing my goals. Instead of dreaming big, I work hard and maintain truthful connections with others. As I approach 51, I am filled with excitement, knowing that there is more to achieve and contribute to this world.