Family growth
When do we lose the inhibition to question everything we do not know or understand? As a young boy, I recall bombarding my grandfather with hundreds of questions. He patiently answered many, while some remained mysteries. Yet, I trusted his opinion because he took the time to respond thoughtfully and honestly. Even though he might have told me a few white lies, like the existence of Santa Claus, my trust stemmed from his consistent effort to engage with my queries.
I vividly remember a moment when I questioned my grandfather about my parents’ separation over the phone. Instead of giving a direct answer, he shared a story. At that tender age of about 10, I probably already knew the answer, but I wasn’t ready to accept it. His closing words, “You are blessed to know and have had your father, mother, and three of your grandparents in your life,” didn’t sit well with me at the time. I was longing for my father’s presence, oblivious to the bigger picture.
Now, 41 years later, I reflect on that moment with gratitude. Despite my father’s illness and our strained relationship, I acknowledge the lessons I’ve learned, even if they weren’t always positive. My grandfather’s message about having five influential adults in my life resonates deeply now. Each of them, with their unique qualities, has left an imprint on my character, for better or worse.
Looking back, I wish I had asked my grandparents and parents more about their upbringing and experiences. With only one grandparent graduating high school, both my parents completing high school, and two out of three siblings earning college degrees, I realize the importance of understanding our family history and the opportunities it has afforded us.
Our family tree continues to grow and branch out, accumulating knowledge and socio-economic wealth over time. Yet, amidst our progress, it’s crucial not to overlook the hardships endured by our ancestors. May we honor their struggles and sacrifices as we pave the way for future generations.
Thank you for joining me on this journey. Your friend, Wakime